Avengers aged

 Capt America now just known as Murica

 Tony Stark Iron Man now retired with pacemaker

 Hulk finally lost his mind, so spends his days eating ice cream and riding yellow busses

 Spider-Man just took too many hits, now cant control his bowel movements, and shoot out on there own

 Wolverine at the ripe old age of....who know lost his mind and forgot how to put his claws away

The Almighty Thor no longer feels to wield his hammer, now it is just one pint after another